Official Alley Assassin 2000 Rules

Rule 1. Judicat0r

I, David Guskin, am the all-knowing, all-powerful Judicat0r. If there are any disputes regarding the rules stated here, those disputes will be settled by me. My word is final.

Rule 2. Assassination

Murdering your fellow Moles is a simple task. All that is required is a suitable bomb.

A bomb is any device that obeys the following restrictions:

1. The bomb must be detonated by the target, and only the target.
2. A bomb detonation must involve some visual or audible sign produced by the bomb. Like a boom, for instance. And said detonation must be noticed by the target.
3. The bomb must include the name of the target and the name(s) of the assassin(s).

A lame bomb is a bomb which produces a sub-audible/sub-visible detonation.
A defused bomb is a bomb which is detonated by someone other than the bomb's intended target.

Any given target can be assassinated only once, at which point they must run and hide in shame. Master Assassins become targets for their alley as well (see Rule 7), and can be assassinated in the same way. Up to three (but no more than three) assassins can work as a team to eliminate a single target, and share the points gained in doing so. In addition, any would-be assassin can personally deliver a bomb to a target (suicide bomb) once during the course of the game.

Rule 3. Spoils

In a successful assassination attempt, the detonated bomb returns to the assassin's possession.
If the attempt at assassination fails, the bomb goes into the would-be target's possession.

Rule 4. Lameness

If a lame bomb is detonated, but the assassin retrieves his or her device before anyone is the wiser, the target's alley will lose points (for insufficient paranoia) and the assassin's alley will lose points (for lameness).

Rule 5. Virtual Assassination

In general (almost always), the detonation of any virtual bomb (a bomb triggered via the operation of a computer) will not be considered a true assassination. If it's really, really good, I might reconsider. But don't count on it. Hence, a virtual bomb is no bomb at all.

Rule 6. Damage, personal and property

Don't actually kill or maim anyone. No matter how much you want to.

Don't make a bomb which will wreak havoc the likes of which will piss off me or Nate (Damage Control). Real explosions don't make good Alley Assassin bombs, as tempting as they might be.

Rule 7. Master Assassins

Assassins who manage to make three successful assassinations become Master Assassins. A Master Assassin becomes a target for their own alley. If a Master Assassin is killed, they cease to be a Master Assassin and instead become Lame. Lamers must score an additional three kills to regain their Master status.

Rule 8. Scoring

It isn't really a rule, but it is important. Here's how the scoring works:

All alleys start with 0 points. Assassins gain points by having their name on a successfully detonated bomb. The points received from an assassination attempt are split among the assassins involed. If an attempt is made on an at-large target, only the assassin's alley receives a point change; the target's alley does not.

Event	Your alley scores...	Target's alley scores...
Successful assassination (of one regular target)	+20	-15
Failed assassination (with lame bomb)	-2	-5
Failed assassination (with defused bomb, saving target)	-5	+5 (defuser's alley)
Become a Master Assassination	+40 (plus kill)	0 (no further loss)
Assassinate a Master Assassination	+30	-15 (and a thumpin')

Of course, this doesn't take into account style points, which means that depending on how you make your assassination attempt, I may award or remove points solely on the basis of how cool or lame you are (respectively). If you are really lame and annoying, I'll come kill you myself. And I won't be obeying Rule 6, either.

Rule 9. Questions

Not really a rule, either, but something to keep in mind: The Judicat0r is too lazy to answer questions that start out like "how many style points do I get for...?" If you ask this question, I may have to break out some Goldstein's Mechanics and beat you over the head. However, if you plan to do something that is questionably legal, and you ask first, you will be given special consideration. Otherwise, you will be shafted.

Rule 10. Concerns

Well, this isn't really a rule, either, but more of a guideline: the Judicat0r is a nice guy, but he too has his limits. Cause trouble for him, and he will quickly transform into a cruel, heartless bastard sought on destroying you.

Rule 11. Fin

The game ends when (a) there is only one target remaining, or (b) the cannon fires, signaling the end of First Term. Whichever happens first.

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