Anyway, at least they had the common sense and decency to equip us before they sent us out on this dog mission. I got myself a nice heavy mace - just the sort of leverage I felt was appropriate and necessary. Also, a sturdy big wooden shield to deflect all those vicious claws and pointy teeth I was certain to encounter, as well as a half-decent suit of armor, scalemail, cumbersome and weighty. I guessed I had to pay with my mobility for my extra protection. In any case, it was better than running bare-ass in the jungle now, wasn't it?

Well, we got equipped and we proceeded down the road south. We traveled and traveled for hours until we covered the 16 miles to the supposed location of the brigandage. Well, we did not find anything, except for some worn tracks leading into the forest. They were older than the assumed date of attack, so it was unlikely that they were left by the same caravan. Then where was it? Fishy as herring, dammit! I thought the dogs played us for fools, but hey, I was certain we'd soon find out what the jig was in any case.

Since we were kind of stuck with nothing in our hand but these stupid old tracks, I urged the gang to follow them. Perhaps they would lead to a brigand hide-out or something else that could be related to the missing caravan.

We had been travelling in the forest for awhile when our forward scout Anlia gave us the alert sign and then the danger sign. I immediately cast defensive spells and none too soon, for a couple of hyena-like humanoids showed up to the right of us. They saw us and we saw them and then Khuzdak alarmed us of a couple others coming at us from behind. Fucking ambush! We really needed a tracker type in our gang, or this would always happen.

Anyhow, the dogheads attacked yapping in their unknown canine language. They were well-equipped and clearly well-trained. Soon we saw yet another one, so it was five of us versus five of them. That and the slight detail that among us only Khuzdak and I were any good in melee. Benny and Anlia shot one of the gnolls down, but the others slashed down first Benny, then me. Fucking shame. Next time, we ought to fight these walking hyenas only if we are two on one in our favor.

When I came to, I learned the gnolls had vacated with their unconscious ones when the battle had reached a virtual stalemate. Hmm, I guess the gnolls were not as pathetic and stupid as I would expect from dogheads.

We rested for awhile and I healed the wounded. Then, we were on our way. We figured we needed more info, so we looked for it. I personally wanted to capture a gnoll alive and question him, the hard way if necessary. We could not speak their language, but my magic would help me understand what they would say.

We moved around in the forest like blind men, and it must have been sheer luck that we did not get ambushed and wiped out by a bigger gnollish patrol. Eventually, we headed south down the road and reached the end of the forest. There, we found farmlands and a bunch of brainless hicks and half-elf yokels . Fucking peasants! I instinctively hate and despise such base scum. Mobs of shit like that are only dangerous by force of numbers. Disperse them like sheep, cut them down one by one, and then those whom you spare would fight for the privilege of licking your boot! In manure they live and manure they are.

In any case, Tarquin parleyed politely and got some half-useful info - gnolls were reported fighting kobolds in forest. That was important for us, because it meant kobolds might be interested in allying themselves with us against the gnolls. Indirectly, that might help us retrieve the weapons stash from the caravan the gnolls stole.

Thus we turned about and headed back into the forest, this time zigzagging to the west of the road in search of gnoll and kobold activity. For quite some time we found nothing, until one day Anlia found an ogre ahead. Tarquin went and parleyed and did not get eaten - that boy is real smooth! Tarquin learned from ogre that the gnolls were north. We moved a short while north and found a big gnoll camp!

The gnoll camp contained about 200 gnolls, both warriors and families. There were a few cabins for the gnolls and a couple slave pens. A small number of emaciated orc and kobold slaves lay listlessly in the pens obviously in expectation of being eaten by the gnolls eventually.

It was pretty clear to anyone of us at this point that we needed allies if we were to bust in this camp and retrieve the shipment, for it seemed almost certain that if it was anyplace in this forest, it ought to be here. Hence we decided to scout some more in the forest in search of more information and possibly kobold allies.

We noticed that there were some new arrivals into the big gnollish camp, who came in following a track. We reasoned the track could be leading to kobold territory judging by the number of the pathetic lizard prisoners that the arriving party had herded in. We followed that wartrack north for a couple of days until we reached a second gnollish camp, this time much smaller than the previous one.

There were maybe 50 gnolls scattered around among the two huts and the two slave pens. There were also two wracked wagons, which we immediately suspected were the target of our rescue operation. Anlia sneaked into the camp at night and searched the wagons but found nothing. Thus, we were not certain if these were our wagons or not. We had to assume they were, so we clearly had to attack this camp first.

We followed an outgoing gnollish raiding party for awhile in the hope that they would lead us to some kobolds. They did! They went and attacked a kobold camp, killed some, then swerved around and tried to retreat. Nice strategy except for one little detail - we were waiting for them in ambush! Bam! Surprise! Shoot, shoot, smash, smash, slash, slash, and soon it was all over. It was still a pretty hard battle, and I again got slashed down among others, but hey, at least this time we won! We got a couple of masterwork swords from the corpses of the dogheads and we finally felt like we could dish it out too. Ah, the sweet, invigorating taste of victory!

Anyway, the piddly lizards were obviously impressed, so Tarquin got to suck out some basic info, but more importantly, convince them to attack the gnollish camp! Well, well, I guess the gnolls had had it coming for some time, but somehow the lizards had been too demoralized to stand up for themselves, at least until we showed up and killed these raiders.

If you ask me, it does not make any sense that 150 kobolds should be so scared of 50 gnolls. With such numerical advantage, no matter how pathetic they were, the kobolds had no excuse to wimp around and let the gnolls slaughter them on a daily basis. This comes to show how important it is to retain spirit and self-respect regardless of circumstances. If you let yourself be persuaded that you are a wimpy victim and that there is nothing you can do about anything, then you have already lost everything - everybody will kick you around and take advantage of you and treat you like garbage. That is no life. It is better to stand up for yourself and try to improve your condition even if the risk and difficulty are great. I would rather die for a chance of a better life than live like a wretched animal with no hope, no rights, and no future.

In any case, the little lizards found some spunk about themselves and were ready to attack. We talked to their leader - an unpleasantly evasive little shit called Akok. I somehow immediately distrusted him; perhaps I was too suspicious, or perhaps I was still incredulous that these guys had spent so much time being killed and eaten by an enemy they outnumbered three to one!

At this point, a new recruit joined our motley gang. It turned out that not all kobolds were spineless pathetic losers, because here we had a jolly little lizard, who soon proved to be a competent wielder of divine magic and a tough little fella. The new find's name was Ickiegoo, or some such, as far as we could tell from his high-pitched snarl. Thus now there were six of us.

Akok's plan was that we protect his casters, who would stay back and weave their magicks as the rest of the kobolds would charge forward. That was peachy with me, because I did not fancy charging in the middle of 50 gnolls, taking into account previously we were once beaten by five and once barely won against another five.

The battle went pretty smoothly and not very memorably. A few gnolls made it through the mass of kobolds and charged towards us. Strangely, they ignored their obvious target - the kobold sorcerers that pelted their troops from a distance. Instead, they jumped on us, as if we were a bigger threat. Silly dogheads. At the expense of their lives, they struck down everybody in our little gang but Ickiegoo and me, while the kobold sorcerers killed a number of gnolls and the gnoll leader's favorite beast, a huge tiger. This foolishness confirmed my belief that the gnolls were not as smart as they were vicious. Much brawn, little brains.

When the dust settled, it became clear that the kobolds had lost about half of their number while the gnolls were almost completely wiped out. Unfortunately, the leaders ran away with a handful of guards. Fortunately, they did not have the time to take all their loot with them. I was quick to ravage through the two huts, for I knew it would not be long before the kobolds might do that themselves. There was nothing magical, but Anlia and I found a number of masterwork weapons, two chainshirts, one half-plate, and a case of miscellaneous treasure - gold, gems, potions, and a wand. I dumped my bulky and annoying scalemail and put on one of the slick chainshirts, so I felt like a thousand gold! My mood improved even further when I found a masterwork heavy mace around the pile of weapons. Sweet! I could see all the skulls I would bash in with this baby!

Next, I went out and busted both wagons to pieces, because I really did not want to miss any secret compartments. This procedure revealed that no such spaces were present in the wagons, which indicated to us that we had the wrong wagons. This meant that to complete the mission, we had to go smash the main gnollish camp, but that was clearly unfeasible with 80 kobolds against 200 gnolls. If it took 150 kobolds to kill 40 gnolls and suffer 50 percent casualties, simple arithmetic said that it would take 750 kobolds and 375 casualties to kill 200 gnolls even if we do not take into account any extra magical power that the gnolls might have.

All this and the unavailability of immediate kobold reinforcements meant this entire mission was doomed to failure as far as the shipment of the fat cats in Spindle was concerned. As far as I was concerned, it was a qualified success, for we got good treasure, gained some experience and toughness, and made up a working combo of our abilities.

Actually, I was very doubtful that there was any shipment in the first place. I had this nagging suspicion that it was all a ruse. If you are in charge of transporting a valuable shipment, but you are a greedy thieving liar, wouldn't you be at least tempted to pocket the shipment and let the gnolls ravage the caravan to cover your thievery? Then you can do even better -- round up a bunch of riff-raff newcomers, who have no friends, no money, no power, and no knowledge of this place, and send them on a suicide mission to search for something that is not there, in a forest stuffed with bloodthirsty vicious gnolls. If that does not stink of bloody setup to high heavens, my name is not Magnus! Anyway, I felt determined that one day those pigs in Spindle would answer some good questions, even if I would have to beat it out of them. Not that I would mind...

After some heal-up and discussion as to what to do next, we headed for Spindle to report on the mission and cash in our treasure for some good old gold and some necessary supplies. The journey and the Spindle stay went uneventfully. Since we had done alright, the Spindle dogs felt we were even about that guard thing. Even, my ass! I almost got killed twice in that forest; that is hardly the same as a guard getting rightly clobbered for an unjustified arrest. Spindle and I are even when I say we are even!

The mayor, Elum, did not seem that concerned with the apparent loss of the shipment, which only strengthened my suspicion that it was all a ruse. Nothing would be done to curb the gnolls either, so I expected the kobolds would soon be wiped out. There would go the allies those idiots in Spindle might one day need to deal with the gnolls. Ah, well, it is not my job to save fools from their own stupidity. Besides, wouldn't it be ironic if Spindle would fall victim to a disaster, which it could have avoided had it listened to the warning of a gang of strangers it mistreated?

Anyway, that was the end of the caravan rescue nonsense.