Watson Song Lyrics

July 1999-October 1999


These are songs I have written as a Watson Fellow. Some songs are based on situations I have been in and others are just ideas out of the blue. For example, "Children" was written in response to the way kids watch me while I am busking... the young ones just stare because they have not yet been conditioned to do otherwise. "Schizophrenia," on the other hand, was inspired by a CRAZY thunderstorm in Florence. Also, I must mention that a couple of the tunes are still rather incomplete (as may seem obvious)... I am still awaiting the rest of those lyrics... :)
Well, I hope you enjoy the words. I am always open to your comments!

1. Children
2. Alone
3. Anxious
4. Therapy
5. I Wanna Go Home
6. Here's To Travelling On My Own
7. Cheers to Buskers
8. Fragile
9. Schizophrenia
10. I Am an Artist
11. What I've Got
12. Spiritual Ambitions
13. Sounds in My Head
14. Return to Longing
15. Good Intentions
16. I Miss You
17. Free



1. Children


Children are the hope for us
Children are inherently blessed

Unjadedly open to what they see,
Living in the moment, innerly free

We have so much to learn from the youth
They alone behold the truth

Children are the hope for us
Children can free us from the past

Free of worries, free of guilt,
Innocence on which love can be built

We owe so much to the young
We leave them so much work to be done

Children are the hope for us
Children, dear children, we must trust.
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2. Alone


You believe you're the only one
You feel so alone

I may be on my own,
But that's only in a physical sense
It's only our material illusion,

After all, we're all in the same boat
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3. Anxious


I feel so anxious
I'm full of worry
Disarray occupies my mind like
A foreign territory

Why can't I
Just let it all go?
Why is it so hard
To go with the flow?

Every person
Has her lessons to learn
Well this is my disease that
Itches and burns

I am freaking out
Out of control
There's this burning anxiety
Singeing my soul

I must relax
I gotta kick back
I need to get free
Of my inner misery!

Oh, there must be a way
To let it all go
Breathe slow
Breathe deep
Breathe slow to let it all go.
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4. Therapy


Dear Dear Anonymous Friend

The way I left home was less than ideal
I had to get over my big crush on you
And in doing so, I made my way
Through many turbulent phases:
Rejection, disappointment, anger sorrow
Awkward distance and a few thousand miles

I would guess you did not know my feelings for you
Perhaps you guessed at the truth, but you would not believe
I could be so enamored with you
I believed in you
I believed in my feelings and there were times when
I'd have let myself just fall into you

I should probably be thanking you
For pushing me the hell away
Obviously things weren't right between us, that's how it worked out
Maybe I just read you wrong, you know you're hard to read!
But I felt like you had feelings for me too.
And so I wonder, what happened?

I didn't push enough, she pushed and won
But I didn't want to push, and I didn't want to win
I just wanted it all to flow
Flow together
But I guess when you want it to flow
You don't get to navigate
And I guess when you really let it flow
It takes a course of its own

The strange thing is you seem like a boy to me now
After all that went down how can I help
Thinking of you in this way?
This must all sound really harsh to you
But I am doing my best
To be objective
To be honest
To just damn get over you

Do you even think of me now?
Do you feel any regrets?
Do you have the slightest clue?
When will I truly and honestly be able to thank you?
The fantasy and the dream still linger on
The dream that this would be a love poem
With honeys and honeys and honeys and sweethearts
Rather than this anguished note

I comfort myself in the belief
t the next time I see you
I will have moved beyond this whole note
I will look back on it and laugh out loud
It will feel good.
With love, Brigitte.
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5. I Wanna Go Home


I've had enough and I wanna go home
I am tired of this feeling alone
I see myself as a leaf being blown
With no idea as to where I am goin'

The miles I travel are a measure
Of the distance I feel inside
Am I on a path of self-discovery?
Or am I just looking for a good place to hide

I've had enough and I wanna go home
I am tired of this feeling alone
I see myself as a leaf being blown
With no idea as to where I am goin'

I try to open up to where I am
But it's all the bad stuff that filters in
And as I close up to protect myself
I feel my spirit wearing thin

I've had enough and I wanna go home
I am tired of this feeling alone
I see myself as a leaf being blown
And I've got no idea where I'm goin'

I try to let go of all these feelings
I I surrender
I give myself some space to be human:
Imperfect and tender

I am here on my own
And I'm being shown
The difficulties of growin'
The beauty of knowin'
That I can be here on my own
Yes, I can be here on my own
I am here on my own
And I can be here on my own
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6. Here's to Travelling on My Own

Here's to travelling on my own
Here's to travelling roads unknown
Exploring the world I see
Discoveries made innerly

Many hours spent on the train
At the window many a terrain
So many insights to gain
Of this journey I can't complain

Here's to travelling on my own
Here's to travelling roads unknown
Exploring the world I see
Discoveries made innerly

Languages buzzing round my head
My curiosities are fed
And if you think the world around you lays dead
Then you are severely misled

Here's to travelling on my own
Here's to travelling roads unknown
Exploring the world I see
Discoveries made innerly

Doo dee doo.
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7. Cheers to Buskers

Cheers to buskers everywhere,
Cheers to all of you
You bring music to people's lives,
Wonder and laughter too!
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8. Fragile


I'm in a Fragile State of Mind
In my solitude confined
This journey has its price
The way I'm feeling now is a payment

My feet hurt, I've been walking too much
And everything I see says Do Not Touch
People speak and I don't understand
Woe is me, alone in a foreign land

I'm in a Fragile State of Mind
In my solitude confined
This journey has its price
The way I'm feeling now is a payment

I don't mean to complain
But I just gotta get rid of all of this pain
There are plenty of ups with the downs
But I'm just on the difficult part of the rounds

I'm in a Fragile State of Mind
In my solitude confined
This journey has its price
The way I'm feeling now is a payment
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9. Schizophrenia


Schizophrenia
I am losing control
I cannot find my soul
Schizophrenia

Am I here, or am I there?
Am I really anywhere?
Who is me, and what am I?
What to do, how and why?

Schizophrenia
I am losing control
I cannot find my soul
Schizophrenia

I turned myself in to the lost and found
Another lost soul wand'rin' around
Crazy, a little neurotic,
Or maybe just normal, and a little exotic?

Schizophrenia
I am losing control
I cannot find my soul
Schizophrenia

It's a thunderstorm passing through
Leaves me wet, scared, and a little confused
The storm will pass and the sky will clear
And so too I shall escape my clouds and fear

Schizophrenia
I am losing control
I cannot find my soul
Schizophrenia

Schizophrenia
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10. I Am an Artist

I sell myself on the streets
But I am not a prostitute
I hold my hat out for your change
But I am not a beggar

I am an artist,
A street artist
And you are
This busker's audience

My stage is the pavement
This hat is my box office
This show has general admission
My agent gets no commission

I am an artist,
A street artist
And you are
This busker's audience

No colleagues, no community
No office politics, no promotions
No pay for sick days
For my freedom: a loss of respect

I am an artist,
A street artist
And you are
This busker's audience

Please don't just walk on by.
Can't you give me just a little smile
Please
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11. What I've Got


What have I got?
I've got my voice
What have I got?
I've got my soul

I've got nothing to lose
I've got it all to gain
I seek to amuse
I hope to entertain

I've got my lungs
I've got my will
I've got my mouth
I've got my heart

I've got nothing to lose
I've got it all to gain
I seek to amuse
I hope to entertain

What have I got?
I've got myself
What have you got?
You've got my attention

We've got nothing to lose
We've got it all to gain
I seek to amuse
You hope to be entertained
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12. Spiritual Ambitions

I would love to solve all the problems of this world
But I am not such a naove little girl
I know that I must begin with myself
To amass some spiritual wealth

Be patient
Believe
What I really need
I shall receive
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13. Sounds in My Head


I wish that I could share
The sounds that I make in my head
Vibrations on air
Through ear canals are lead
I hear myself so differently
From the way the world hears me
I wish you could hear
The sounds in my head so clear

But we don't look as we feel
And we don't sound like what we hear
When I listen to myself
I can't believe it's not someone else

To whom does that voice belong?
To everyone but me
And even as I sing this song
The tones are a mystery
Are the speakers all telling a lie?
Or is the microphone a bad guy?
Is it hollows inside my skull
That make it all sound so full?

But we don't look as we feel
And we don't sound like what we hear
When I listen to myself
I can't believe it's not someone else

I would not be honest
If I said I like your version best
I guess it's just natural
To be a bit perturbed by it all
Even though it bugs a little bit,
I'll keep singing in spite of it
I still wish that you could hear
The voice in my head so clear!
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14. Return to Longing


Your forward style and flattery
Remind me of the things I used to be
I feel so out of reach and hard to see
And if I were touched, what would happen to me?

It's the return to longing
It's the long to return
Feels like I'm belonging
To all those who yearn

I think I'll let you know just how long ago
Before saying stop I used to say go
Such a longtime since I let someone love me
What would happen if I gave someone something of me?

It's the return to longing
It's the long to return
Feels like I'm belonging
To all those who yearn
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15. Good Intentions


I am scared
I am afraid
I don't know what to do
About you

I'm afraid of all the guilt
I will feel if I hurt you
I am so scared
Of what my good intentions could do to you


I would love to be nice
But that would oppose all good advice
Been in that trap already twice
And do not wish to make it thrice

I'm afraid of all the guilt
I will feel if I hurt you
I am so scared
Of what my good intentions could do to you

I would love to be friends
But this is where the conversation ends
She who a little lends
Gives ten times what she intends
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16. I Miss You


I miss you
I think of you
I miss you
And I love you

Sometimes I feel as though you're right here
I know it's wishful thinking making it thus appear
How long will it take the time to go by?

I miss you
I think of you
I miss you
And I love you

Maybe if I keep real busy I won't even notice
Maybe if I keep from feeling anything at all
But when I hear your voice when I get your call I know why

I miss you
I think of you
I miss you
And I love you
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17. Free


I believe
That you receive
And you see me
As what you need

But I am free
And I receive
And I will be
Just what I need!

I will go my own way
And I will pass my own day
If you want to come with me
You must let me be free

You will show
Me where to go
You will show
Me as you know

But my life will unfold
Not as I am told
Not within your mold
I will not be controlled

I will go my own way
And I will pass my own day
If you want to come with me
You must let me be free
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