I'm sick of being gay.
And I'm sick of being smart,
I'm tired of being a scientist.
I'm tired of caring,
I don't want to feel,
I don't care to think anymore.

I want to be normal.

I want to go to bars and get drunk.
I want to date women and have meaningless sex.
I want to ditch people when they're depressing.
I want to get married and get a mundane job,
I want to raise 2 and a half kids to be hypocrites like their folks,
I want to watch football and drink beer,
I want to vote Republican,
I want to buy junk food at the grocery store in bulk,
I want to watch television for wit and charm,
I want to go to church on Sundays thinking it's all bullshit,
Hobnobbing with the proper folk.

And I don't want to be gay anymore.

I don't want my siblings to need to take a while to accept me
I don't want my folks to worry about whether I have AIDS.

And I don't want to be smart anymore,
I don't want to be rational all the time,
I don't want to bury myself in books and abstracts and papers and data,

And I don't want to feel anymore,
I don't want to be jealous of all the guys' girlfriends,
I don't want to hear the grad-student who committed suicide,
and the drop-out who committed suicide,
and that guy who flipped out and got shipped off,

And I don't want to be this.
And I don't want to be here.
And I don't want to be talking
to you
or anybody else
right now.

I just want to be normal.