May 26 thru June 3, 1996
Caution: Magical Bard
June 3 thru June 10, 1996
Hot Pizza Zone
June 11 thru June 18, 1996
Militia Crossing
June 19 thru June 25, 1996
Fool Ahead
June 26 thru July 2, 1996
Warning: Sign
July 2 thru July 10, 1996
Masonry Ahead: Stopping is Advisable
July 10 thru July 16, 1996
Caution: Falling Space-Rocks
July 16 thru July 25, 1996
Dull Scenery: Next 62 Miles
July 25 thru July 31, 1996
Something Awesome Ahead!
August 1 thru August 7, 1996
Snakes Playing with Rocks
(Editor's Note: This is what happens when I run out of ideas...)
August 7 thru August 14, 1996
Protozoan Crossing
August 15 thru August 22, 1996
Reverse Faulting in Median
Sudden Overhangs May Result
August 23 thru August 31, 1996
Falling Rocks
Larger Debris Also Possible
September 1 thru September 7, 1996
100% Grade -- 1 Mile Ahead
Floor It Now or Give It Up
September 8 thru September 15, 1996
Welcome to Nevada
September 16 thru September 24, 1996
VERY Dangerous Curve Ahead
September 25 thru October 3, 1996
Approaching Nacho Area
(Editor's Note: This is what happens when I run out of ideas again...)
October 4 thru October 10, 1996
Nothing Ahead
(Editor's Note: Ironically enough, this was not due to lack of ideas...)
October 11 thru October 24, 1996
Really Bad Drivers
Next 3 Cities
October 25 thru November 5, 1996
Men Flaking
(Editor's Note: Ah... inspiration! (Sorry about the pause.))
November 5 thru November 12, 1996
No Surprise
November 12 thru November 25, 1996
Watch for Falling Shadows
November 25 thru December 4, 1996
Holiday Zone Ahead
(Editor's Note: Gotta love that double-X theme!)
December 4 thru December 10, 1996
Christmas Tree Area
Beware of Cheapskate Tree-hunters
December 11 thru December 18, 1996
Beware of Falling Common Sense
December 19, 1996 thru January 5, 1997
Keep Vents Closed
Next 40 Miles
January 6 thru January 19, 1997
Improperly Dated Material
Next ?? Days
January 20 thru January 29, 1997
The Pack is Back
January 30 thru February 4, 1997
Star Wars Showing Ahead
Expect Delays
February 5 thru February 11, 1997
Stunt Crossing
February 12 thru February 19, 1997
Beware of Mushy Sap
February 20 thru March 3, 1997
Birthday Zone
March 4 thru March 31, 1997
Expect Delays
(Editor's Note: Yes, this comes from personal experience.
As of April 7, I still haven't been healed, but I figured it was time
to change the sign.)
April 1, 1997
Satan is Good; Satan is Your Pal
(Editor's Note: Please do not take this seriously. It is (was)
April Fool's Day. (Quote lifted from The 'Burbs.))
April 2 thru April 9, 1997
What's Your Sign?
April 10 thru April 14, 1997
Convenience Store Ahead
April 15, 1997
Welcome to Taxes
April 16 thru April 25, 1997
Caution: Big, Honkin' Bump
April 26 thru May 19, 1997
Warning: Unrealistic Geology Ahead
May 19 thru June 5, 1997
Large Flying Insects Ahead
June 5 thru June 19, 1997
Frustration Ahead
June 19 thru June 30, 1997
Freedom Limit
(Editor's Note: There are actually many proposed Amendments to the U.S. Constitution. This refers primarily to the ridiculous Flag Desecration Amendment passed by the House in a frightening 310-114 vote.)
June 30 thru July 14, 1997
Watch Out for Bouncing NASA Probes
July 14 thru July 28, 1997
Impressive Viewpoint